Kingsman: The Golden Circle movie review

Kingsman The Golden Circle Movie Review

L-r, Pedro Pascal, Halle Berry, Channing Tatum, Taron Egerton, Mark Strong, Colin Firth, Jeff Bridges, Julianne Moore and Elton John, star in Twentieth Century Fox’s “Kingsman: The Golden Circle.”

Out in theaters is The Kingsman The Golden Circle

Eggsy is Back!

So is almost everyone else apparently. And I will get to that in a moment.

The headquarters of Kingsman is destroyed along with almost every single Kingsmen and the world is held hostage with the new big bad Poppy played by Julianne Moore. Wonderfully over the top played I might add. She steals every scene she is in.

Eggsy must join forces with the United States secret allied team the Statesman.

Secret as in they had no idea they existed.

Eggsy’s counter part is played by Channing Tatum codenamed Tequila. Its more of a cameo actually. Sorry ladies!

The A list cast who is also joining this sequel is Halle Berry, Jeff Bridges and Elton John.

Yes I said Elton John and of course Colin Firth. Yes I said Colin Firth who DIED OF A HEAD SHOT IN THE LAST MOVIE. Sorry spoiler alert if you haven’t seen the first one.

Let me start by saying I loved the first one. It was so campy and over the top and way too much violence but it was SO MUCH FUN!

My expectations were extremely high of course but the movie opens up with a huge close quarters fight scene with a previous bad guy Charlie who we all thought was dead that I found nauseating to my eyes. My head seemed to be whipping back and forth to try and keep up with the action.

And it just kept getting worse from there.

Apparently they thought the franchise would not survive without Colin Firth’s character Harry who was killed by a POINT BLANT HEADSHOT in the first one.

Again, I apologize for the spoiler alert but I doubt you are watching this if you have not seen the first one.

Somebody probably said this movie is so unbelievable, so over the top, why not just bring back Harry since nothing else in this film could possibly happen in the real world. Why not make is almost impossible to die?

Another thing that made me so angry was the depiction of women in this film. My jaw was on the floor time and time again starting with a unbelievable moment they claim the only way to insert a tracking device on a female suspect was to insert it into the membrane of… well you figure it out for yourself. I guess the most advanced intelligence agency in the world never thought of using a needle or maybe on the inside of the lips or mouth.

Not to mention when once again someone is brought back from the dead the first thing he does is sexually aggressively go after Halle Berrys character Ginger Ale before she brings him back to the real world by showing him a photograph and he snaps back to being a gentleman I guess.

WAY WAY WAY to much.

This movie made me so angry. It is so bad. I get it’s a over the top bond spoof it but it plays like a superhero Austin Power movie that takes itself seriously.

At 2 hours and 21 minutes long. Yes 2 HOURS and 21 MINUTES I want my time back.

I got in for free but I want reimbursed for WASTING MY TIME and my lovely wifes time who will probably never go to the movies with me again.

I HATED this!

I give it an F

Don’t waste your time, don’t waste your money don’t even watch it when It comes to HBO or whatever.

Of course I would love to hear from you if you didn’t take my advice and saw it let me know below and as always.

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Last review posted was Stronger